Two years ago today

On September 8, 2011 I began walking the Camino de Santiago from St. Jean Pied de Port France. The first day was the hardest but in some ways the most significant. It is said that if you can survive day one, then you can do it.

When I arrived in SJPP, I checked in to my hostel - L’Esprit du Chemin,  “the spirit of the way” a very special place in a tradition of simplicity, quality and inspiration and a great start to my pilgrimage. It was the only place I pre-booked other than the Parador in Santiago, and I was ever so glad I did. The volunteers who ran the place were so supportive and helpful. They prepared a beautiful meal where we all ate together and introduced ourselves, chatting with excitement and anticipation of our journey ahead. I met some really amazing people there, some I have kept in touch with - Anna and Francis - and others who I never saw again but who remain in my memory only.

So today, as I reflect on that first day, the beginning of an experience that was to change my life, I am reminded of the things I learned as I walked "The Way":

I learned to live in the moment. On that very first day I kept looking ahead to see what was coming next; what was around the next corner or how much further till it got a bit easier. I remember stopping in the middle of the path and telling myself out loud to STOP and BE in THIS moment and accept it for what it was. I have become much better at being exactly where I am without thinking about what I have to do next or what's around the next corner. I've stopped worrying about what the future holds and I'm trying not to dwell in the past. 

I learned to be gentler with my opinion of others. I met so many people who had stories about their lives that I would never have guessed until they told me. It made me realize that when we see a person or meet someone for the first time, we don't know them and we have no idea what their story is. I think we all tend to make snap judgements about people based on what we "see". I learned so much about listening and hearing what others had to say.

And by following the proverbial yellow arrows, I found my way to Santiago. To this day, and I'm sure for the rest of my life, a yellow arrow will always be a reminder of my pilgrimage and how I began to find my way. 

Reflection

I wrote this post a while ago and forgot to post it. It's never too late, I reckon....

Over the past couple of months, I’ve had frequent flashbacks from my travels. I’ve been in contact with several people whom I met and have made a point of keeping in contact with regularly. I’m going to tell you about some of them.

Emails from my aunt Susie from Liverpool are fairly regular though we tend to facetime or skype more often. I have been thinking of her, and my uncle Terry so much. They were going to come here for a visit but due to some health circumstances had to cancel their trip. During the time they would have been here, I kept thinking of the things we would be doing together – exploring Vancouver, driving through the Okanagan wine country on our way to Nelson, drives, walks, art exhibitions, theatre, and introducing them to my beloved Nelson would have given me such pleasure. They were so amazing to me whilst I was in Liverpool and it was an opportunity for me to treat them. The weather here was gorgeous – sunny and hot the whole time. My aunt in particular is fond of the warmer climate so she would have been in heaven. No mossies either! Hopefully they can come next year instead.

A year ago I found myself walking Hadrian’s Wall and met some really wonderful people there. One of my favourite travel mates ever was Foxy and I think of her and our time there as well as in Liverpool where I saw her frequently. We hope to do another walk together, maybe the Camino from Portugal or the Wales Coast Path. Whatever we choose it is certain to be an adventure with lots of laughs.

Another amazing {amazing!!} woman I met was Rochelle. She was volunteering with the Missionaries of Charity in Kolkata where we met. We are roughly the same age and had an instant connection and though we worked in different areas, we managed to get to know each other a little bit. Her story is incredible. She is Canadian and lived in Toronto area, working at a good job until one day she decided to quit her job and go to Kolkata to volunteer. She is not Catholic but had read about and admired the work the sisters do there. She got herself a ticket with a return date of six months from then and made her way across the world to a place so different in every way to Canada. She settled in and worked with the mentally and developmentally challenged women at Prem Dam teaching them art and other life skills. She also worked in the afternoons at the orphanage and I’m sure, other things as well. When I met her, she’d been there two months. She kept in regular contact with her family and friends via emails from her iPad and when I left, I asked her to add me to her list. I have been receiving her Sunday updates ever since. Here’s where the story gets really interesting. Because of her success with the program she was doing with the women, the sisters asked her if she would be willing to go to Sri Lanka where they were setting up a similar home there. She followed her heart and off she went. Her heart took her straight to the man she was meant to meet and marry a few months later! She and Roshan are living happily in Kandy, doing their work together in a place where people like them are so needed. How awesome is this!!? She sent me an email a couple of days ago as she had just been to a gathering where a letter was read regarding my dear friend Creos who I also met at Motherhouse and who passed away last year. He was, for me, one of those people who have a huge impact on you and you don’t know how it all came to happen. Serendipity. Faith. Fate. I still can’t believe he is gone and I’ll never see him again.

My friend Flora from London, whom I met in India as well, is now travelling through South America. She writes an incredible blog which I have been following. Her strength of character, wit, charm and grace have given me hope for this generation of vibrant women. I am honored to know her and the other young women I met and travelled with in India – Jess, Bianca, Fiona, Steph, Linnea, Emiko and Diana. I keep up with them all on the Facebook group we created for just that reason. Ah, I miss them all.

So it seems the universe is trying to tell me something. I can’t stop thinking about my travels and the people I met along the way. Am I supposed to keep travelling? I want to go back to India. To volunteer and immerse myself once again in that chaotic but simple life. I long to see more of the world – China, New Zealand, Australia, South Africa, North India, Sri Lanka, Eastern Europe, South America (but only if I can go for at least 4 months) the list goes on, but there are places I’ve been that I loved so much I want to go back!

Although I discarded the hippy bracelets that graced my wrist long ago, I still wear the necklace with my scallop shell from the Camino, my celtic cross from Santiago, my larimar stone from Morocco and my St. Christopher’s medal from one of the sisters at Motherhouse. I find my hand goes to these talismen, these reminders of how I discovered who I am and what moves me. As I fondle these items, I continue to wonder what my purpose is. Time will tell….

Oh Baby!

It's been a long time since I've written on my blog and with the birth of my first blessed grandchild a few days ago, it seems a great reason to put fingers to keys once again.

being held by Uncle Robbie

So let me just say that becoming a grandparent was not at all what I expected. First of all, knowing my beloved daughter was in labor just about killed me. I knew the pain she was facing and had no idea how long she would labor and all I wanted to do was take it on for her. Spoken like a true mom. It doesn't matter how old your kids get, to you, they are still your babies and I couldn't bear my baby in that kind of pain. But she did it! Valiantly and bravely and with love and help from her devoted husband Rob, their doula, and midwife. Bravo!

Secondly, having this time in Vancouver to be with my daughter throughout her pregnancy has been such a blessing for me. To talk about birth, motherhood, parenting and how all these things have evolved and changed over time was such a gift. It's not that we didn't do it "right" in our day, but theories change along the way with new information and a changing world. I felt so honored that she wanted to ask me questions and get my advice (this continues) and even though I was a too young, inexperienced mom, it seemed like I had everything I needed to be one. So this is what I tell my daughter. That within her lies all the wisdom and instinct she needs to take care of her baby. There's a sort of comfort too, knowing she now knows how much I love her because now she's a mom.

tired but beautiful mama

snuggling with his Daddy

So now I just have to gush about "the world's most perfect human being". My grandson, Niko Slade Kozlowski. He is the most perfect, beauteous, astonishingly miraculous tiny person and I am utterly besotted with him. He is exquisite and most perfectly made. Plus, he's really, really cute! I have been in awe watching his parents fall in love with him by the minute and how he has completely perfected the circle of love between them. It is magic. Seeing Rob so involved, so supportive and so interested in every little thing that is going on makes me quite emotional.

sleeping like a baby

And I swear the baby knows who I am. He seems to be listening to me when I talk to him. Well, come on, if he can hear his parents' voices in the womb, surely he can hear mine too, right? All I want to do is gaze at him all day long. I don't even have to hold him as long as I can see him and bask in the wonder of the bonding between them all. I just know he and I are going to be really good pals and if I get to exhibit even half the love my mom bestows on all her grandchildren, then I am truly blessed indeed.

My maternal grandmother who lived all her life in Liverpool used to sing a lullaby to her grandchildren there called "Lula Bye". Although she was known as Granny, my English cousins called her "Lula" as well. In honor of my Granny, whom I only saw a few times in my life but whom I loved dearly and felt very close to, I will be called "Lula".

This is the beginning of the next generation. I wonder how many grandchildren I will be blessed with and I look forward to watching my sons become dads too. This generation has it far more together than any other as they view parenting as a true partnership and an extension of their commitment to each other.

Just the way it should be.

My Mentor - words to live by

††† Prayer of Mother Teresa †††

People are often unreasonable, illogical and self-centered. 
Forgive them anyway.

If you are kind, people may accuse you of selfish, ulterior motives. 
Be kind anyway.

If you are successful, you will win some false friends and some true friends. 
Succeed anyway.

If you are honest and frank, people may cheat you. 
Be honest and frank anyway.

What you spend years building someone could destroy over night. 
Build anyway.

If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous. 
Be happy anyway.

The good you do today, people will forget tomorrow. 
Do good anyway.

Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough. 
Give the world the best you have anyway.

In the final analysis, it is between you and God. It was never between you and them anyway.

Amen †

This is one of the ways my life has changed...

A couple of days ago I was out walking George and as usual, my pace was fast and purposeful. We came across an old man and a small white dog, similar to George. The dogs started to do their thing - as dogs do - and I began to chat with the old man. Normally, I say a few words and then hurry on my way.  The man kept talking as I was inching my way ahead of him, trying to end the conversation so I could resume my regular pace. It occurred to me then, that he clearly wanted someone to talk to so I decided to slow down and listen. What would have normally taken me 20 minutes, ended up taking 45 minutes and I thoroughly enjoyed hearing a little bit about his life. He was born in Nelson and has lived here his entire 84 years. I realized then how unimportant was my drive to walk quickly so as to get some exercise and get on with whatever task was next. How many times have I been obsessed with the hustle and bustle of my life, never having the time to stop and enjoy the simplest of pleasures. I don't miss that part of my life and continue to feel so blessed that I have been bestowed with the seemingly rare gift of time. I pray I use it wisely, with good intentions and an open heart and mind to the gifts that are presented to me each day.

The other day I volunteered as usual to sell Christmas trees for our Rotary Club. When I arrived, someone said to me "Uh oh, are you one of those happy, over the top enthusiastic Christmas people?". I laughed and said of course not! I got to thinking about this later and it dawned on me that I really don't like Christmas and struggle to get myself into the so called "spirit" of it. Since being in Kolkata, all I can think about is what it would be like if I could be there to celebrate Christmas with the sisters at Mother House. I vow I will do this one year! Anyway, I think what I struggle so much with is that at no other time of the year am I so painfully aware of the disparity between the "haves" and the "have nots" and then I chastise myself for being one of the "haves" with so much abundance when others are so very deprived of the most basic needs in life.

This world makes no sense to me.

Work. Work?

When I started this blog well over a year ago, it was just for the purpose of keeping everyone updated while I walked the Camino. I knew there wouldn't be much opportunity to write emails to individual people so I thought is was a good solution. Plus, I wasn't carrying a travel diary per se and wanted to keep track for myself. Through this process, I realize I have come to enjoy writing very much. Because I walk so much, often through beautiful forests, paths, and parks, I have a lot of time to think about things and then I feel compelled to write about them. My memory is also getting very bad so this way, I can remember things I've done. I really don't know who is reading this blog - nobody ever comments - but the statistics show there are a lot of hits. I know some people have had a hard time leaving comments - I think it is some glitch with blogspot and signing in or something - but I would love to hear from anyone who is interested in contacting me. You can reach me at cowanjena@gmail.com.

Kokanee Glacier Hike 2012

I am one of those very fortunate people who has had great opportunity in my life and can now call myself "retired". Well, what I actually say is that I'm temporarily retired. Only because I feel I am too young not to work. All my friends are working and I miss the comaraderie and social-ness of the working environment. I also want to feel productive and needed. Other than an unquenchable desire to travel, I don't really have a purpose anymore. Is that okay? Some people would say it's fine but for me I feel I miss the passion of working at something you love. Something you are building and creating. Yes, there are days when all you can dream about is stopping work, but I think we want to stop because we're tired and stressed and need a break. After a long break, I realize I do want to work but I do NOT want the crazy stress-filled life I once had. So there is a balance that needs to be attained. I have had many months to consider this and ask myself, how do I want to spend my working life? I know it needs to be creative, flexible and feed my soul. I have thought about doing what I think I'm good at - human resources, project management, or some other kind of corporate endeavor. All this equals STRESS. So, I need to go back to what I am passionate about. What keeps surfacing is Design. Specifically graphic design - it's what I should have done when I graduated from high school. I have taken several courses through KSA and feel quite comfortable with the Adobe suite. I have done some freelance work along with quite a bit of pro-bono work and think it could be something that would feed my soul and produce an income that I can do from anywhere. I know I want to live in more than one place therefore need the flexibility to be elsewhere when I want to be. I love Nelson, it's been my home for many years. I have strong roots here - my Mom, my friends, the mountains and the lake lure me back to this place again and again. But I know it is time for a change and after traveling to so many other places in the world, I realize there are many beautiful places that I could call home, at least temporarily. I've been wrestling with this decision for more than a year and feel it's time to make a choice. Whatever I choose, I know that if I am passionate about it, believe in it, embrace it, I will be successful. So off to college I go. I think.

Life in Deep Cove

Deep Cove

Deep Cove Park

Well, I've been here nearly two weeks now and am so far enjoying living in the mountains. Or at least it feels like that anyway. It's very quiet, very hilly, and very beautiful. I am house sitting for friends who head down south every winter and need someone to stay in their beautiful house overlooking the Cove. Hmmm. It wasn't a really hard decision to make. I'm closer to my kids, though James lives in Aldergrove, about an hour away, and Sarah, Rob and Robbie live in East Vancouver, about 30 minutes away. Added bonus is my sister Judith and her husband Peter and my brother Jamie also live about 30 minutes away. So, this is my chance to see what it would be like to live on the coast and be able to participate in and create family gatherings.

The Deck and View

The House

Major challenges include:
• Making new friends in a place where I know nobody.
• Driving in the big city.
• Getting lost.
• Dealing with torrential downpours that last all day.
• Convincing people to make the drive out here.

George and I manage two good walks every day and are discovering some great paths and trails. Our favourite one is Quarry Rock, about an hour and a half there and back. It's challenging - steep in both directions with a bit of flat but all in the forest. The view in the end is lovely and worth it. Not so fun in the rain, but we try and pick drier days to do it.

The squatters

Deep Cove itself reminds me a little of Nelson, only smaller. The village is quaint and overlooks the cove with a lovely park along the shore. The marina with the majestic sailboats, waiting for the perfect opportunity to venture out. People are friendly here as well. I've met dogwalkers, store owners, and random people just smiling and sometimes saying a friendly hello. All in all, I think it will work out just fine and despite my slight lonliness at the moment, I'm enjoying the peace and quiet and know that come May, I'll probably have made a friend or two.

Day 9 - Back to Halifax

We have been staying in a place called Baddeck on Cape Breton Island. Baddeck is a tiny village situated on the northern shores of Bras d'Or lake. The name Baddeck is derived from the Mi'kmaq term "Abadak" which has been translated as "place with an island near". Baddeck is one of several Cape Breton communities that plays host to the Celtic Colours festival each fall. The music festival features hundreds of Celtic musicians from Cape Breton and around the world. And every night after they've played at the various venues, they have an "after party" that begins at 11pm and ends....well, let's just say they serve breakfast at the venue. Our hotel had a free shuttle service to the party and I was thinking what a fun thing that would be to do. But we had to get up early the next day and  I thought it would be too late. I met a young couple at the pub who convinced me to go with them and that I could take the shuttle back at 1:30. I decided to go for it thinking that wouldn't be too late and I could survive. I ended up taking the last shuttle back at 3:30 am arriving at the hotel at 4:00. All I can say is....it was worth it! The music was incredible - the fiddles, accordians, guitars, spoons, singing and of course, the foot stomping! I was so incredibly tired the next day but I would have always regretted it if I hadn't gone.

New Friends

We left Cape Breton Island bright and early and I must admit, I was a little sad. We stopped at Sugar Moon Farm and spent the morning at a charming log cabin where we were treated to a brunch of pancakes, biscuits with maple butter (Yum!!) sausages and of course, plenty of maple syrup. What a feast! We had a tour of the facility and met the family that runs the farm who told us about the unique organic methods they employ to produce the delicious maple syrup. Some things I did not know: Maple syrup only comes from the sugar maple trees which only grow in the East. 90% of all maple syrup is produced in Quebec and it takes approximately 40 litres of sap to make one litre of maple syrup! No wonder it's so pricey.

Sugar Moon Farm

Back to Halifax and the end of our tour. We had such a great time and it was hard saying goodbye to our new friends, our tour guide Chris and trusty (and patient) bus driver Brian. Mom and I went down to the pier for bit of shopping and a last dinner with Denny and Mary at "Salty's". Next part of the adventure begins with the first leg of our train journey all the way back to Vancouver.

Day 8 - Cape Breton Island and the Cabot Trail

Atlantic Coastline

Cabot Trail

We spent the day exploring the Cabot Trail and I fell in love with its rugged terrain and spectacular Atlantic Ocean views. The weather was not so good, a bit foggy, but it cleared from time to time and we were able to marvel at the stunning views. 

St. Peter's Church - Cheticamp

We stopped in Cheticamp for lunch and took a moment to peek into the famed St. Peter's Church and strolled the streets of this traditional village steeped in the vibrant culture of the "Old World" French. At the Acadian museum, we saw a demonstration of the traditional hooked rug. Years ago, I came across one at a antique shop in Victoria. I didn't pay much 
for it, but I liked it and appreciated the handiwork. It wasn't until I saw the hooked rugs here that I realized the value of this rug. I think I'll keep it forever! 

Neil's Harbour

On the way back we stopped at a lovely fishing community called Neil's Harbour. I loved the opportunity to walk around, take pictures and relished the beauty of the coastline that I have come to associate with the east coast of Canada.

I want to say a few words about the people we've met on this tour. Many are from the USA and I have to say, are some of the nicest and friendliest people I've ever met. There are Canadians also and a couple from England. There's Barbara and Ray from New Jersey, Pat from Spokane, Denny and Mary from Wisconsin...to name a few. And in Canada, Joan from Kelowna, Maria from Toronto, Judy and Joan from Alberta. Also, the people in the Maritimes are absolutely the warmest I've met during my travels. Right up there with the Liverpudlians! I had no idea that the rich culture, the fishing and farming, the Acadian history were so profoundly and authentically true to their reputation. Wonderful, wonderful people in Atlantic Canada!

Day 7 - Cape Breton Island

Today we left P.E.I. by ferry back to Nova Scotia across the Northumberland Straight. We drove over the Canso Causeway to Cape Breton Island. It was a stunning drive drive along the pristine shores of Bras d'Or Lakes, Canada's only inland sea. Spent a marvellous afternoon at the Alexander Graham Bell museum - it was a brilliant display of his life and his inventions and his dedication to helping people with hearing problems. It was fascinating....I had no idea!

Day 6 - Charlottown

Home of Lucy Maude Montgomery

My Mom is so cute!

A little old....but I may have found my farmer!

 

The earth is really brick red

Today we visited the Anne of Green Gables museum, the house in which Lucy Maude Montgomery lived and upon which she based her books. The property is still owned by the family and is still farmed - a lot of potatoes, mostly grown for french fries. The grounds surrounding the house are green and lush and exactly as she described them in her book. The soil is brick red and they grow the unusual blue potato which is actually a bright purple. We even got to help the farmer plant some in the garden!

Downtown Charlottown

Charlottown

We spent the afternoon in the seaside town of Charlottetown wandering around the town enjoying the old buildings and the quaint tree lined streets. We visited an old manor house overlooking the bay that has been restored. The history was interesting and evident with much of the old furnishings and dishes, beautiful. dinner at an Irish pub rounded off the evening perfectly.

Day 5 - Prince Edward Island

Confederation Bridge - Cavendish PEI

On to PEI, "Island cradled in the waves" and setting of the famous Anne of Green Gables by Lucy Maude Montgomery. Mom and I were struck by the beauty and pride taken in the rolling, lush green landscape. Everything is so well taken care of...the houses and yards, the farms and buildings so pretty to look at. A highlight of the day was passing over the stately Confederation Bridge into PEI - 13km long! You don't pay a toll to go into PEI, but you pay when you leave! I like it!

dipping my toes in the Atlantic Ocean

On to Cavendish where we headed down to the windy beaches of the Atlantic ocean in Cavendish National Park. I just had to put my feet in....it was not that cold, certainly no worse than Kootenay Lake. Then a quick stop at the village of Rustico and it's celebrated wharf dotted with fishing boats and lobster traps.

Avonlea

A visit to the quaint village of Avonlea where the buildings from Lucy Maude Montgomery's community of Long River were brought, erected and restored to recreate the fictitious town of Avonlea as depicted in the books.

Best oysters in the world!

Fresh today!

Acadian Musicians

We heard musicians play the piano, accordion, fiddle and guitar and then were treated to fresh oysters, the best in the world. Dinner was a traditional kitchen party complete with fresh lobster, mussels, oysters and, of course potatoes! And then the music! We have nothing like this in the west. Everything seems to be about the music and the stories told though it. It's truly wonderful.

Day 4 - The Bay of Fundy

Today we travelled to the Bay of Fundy and the sea sprayed shoreline to the amazing Hopewell Rocks, a New Brunswick icon. These magnificent sandstone rock flower pot formations carved by the Fundy tides rise 4 stories high at low tide and then disappear into tiny islands when the tide is high. This process happens every 6 hours and 13 minutes. We walked on the beach and took the mandatory photo in the "lovers arch".

Later we visited the Pays de la Sogouine Heritage Centre where we experienced a true celebration of Acadian history and culture. The woman who was our guide reminded me SO much of Mathilde Klassen both in mannerisms and enthusiasm. She left us with this message: The most important thing in life is to be proud of who you are and where you came from.....and PARTY!!!


She was great! Learning abou the history of the Atlantic coast has been so wonderful and I have a great appreciation for the Acadian culture and heritage. People worked hard, endured much hardship but always had time to enjoy life. Joie de Vivre, indeed!!

The famous "flowerpot" rock formations at Hopewell

Lovers Arch - Hopewell Rocks

La Pays de la Sagouin

First hand re-enactment of Acadian times

Day 3 - On to New Brunswick

Up early for our trip to New Brunswick. First stop was the Glooscap interpretive centre at Mik'maq where we learned about the first nations people whose history is recorded from 13000 years ago....I had no idea! The young men who ran the centre were knowledgable, keen and very passionate about their culture and people. It was beautifully laid out and most inspiring.

The next stop was the Olivier soapery near Moncton. We were thoroughly entertained by a woman who engaged us and showed us how they make soap with all natural ingredients including olive oil, beeswax, cocoa butter and essential oils. Everything was so beautiful and of course we had to buy some! I'm hoping my skin will improve.

The last part of the day was a fishing trip to see how lobsters are farmed, caught, cooked and eaten. What a treat this was! The boat was sturdy, the people who ran it were awesome and Captain Ron was very entertaining. I found it particularly fascinating to hear about the regulations surrounding the harvest as well as the "gentlemen's" agreement not to fish on Sundays. It's interesting how this is enforced, though no one is admitting to anything. The bottom line is they respect the sea and the generations past, present and future who have earned a living doing this noble profession. We each got a whole lobster to eat.....and you can literally eat almost all of this delicious crusteacion! Their method is to cook it in salted water then immerse in cold salted ice water and eating it just like that. Cold, no butter or sauces, just as it is. Another highlight, for sure.

Day 2 - Peggy's Cove

The Lighthouse at Peggy's Cove

We met up with our group at 8:30 this morning, there are about 43 of us, mostly from the USA. It seems like a great bunch of people. Mom is getting quite a kick out of the tour guide named Chris and totally appreciates that he speaks slowly and clearly and she can hear everything he says. Turns out he's a working Actor and lives in Calgary.

Peggy's Cove

We began the day with a trip to the famous "Peggy's Cove". I loved how unspoiled it is. There are no hotels or typical souvenir shops, only a few shops that sell handmade local art. We walked out to the lighthouse that rests on the huge granite rocks where you can walk nearly to the edge to see the waves crashing onto them. Magnificent! The cove itself is lined with small shake sided shacks in weathered pastels, all with a dock and a fishing boat that looks like its been well used. We could have spent days there. There are several opinions about why it is called Peggy's Cove and who exactly Peggy is. The village is likely named after Saint Margaret's Bay (Peggy being the nickname for Margaret) and the most popular legend claims that the name came from the sole survivor of a shipwreck at Halibut Rock near the cove. No doubt there are many stories to lay claim to the name of this famous and quaint little village.

Back on the bus and to the Halifax harbor where we scattered for lunch. We met a really nice woman from Kelowna named Joan and she is proving to be good company. We ate the best seafood chowder I've ever tasted and sweet fresh cornbread just out of the oven. A few of us decided to do the 100 year anniversary of the sinking of the Titanic at the maritime museum. It was fascinating learning about the part Halifax played in the role of taking in the deceased off the rescue boats and burying the unclaimed bodies in the cemetery here. We visited the unmarked graves, some of which were later identified even years later. There were stories of people who perished that night, whose names and memories live on after 100 years, leaving a significant mark on the history of this beautiful city.

On the Road Again

Kootenay Lake

It's been four months now since I arrived back in Canada and the time has flown by. Seriously, I don't know how that happens. In the first couple of weeks I kept myself busy with paying bills, banking, income tax and house stuff. The weather wasn't great so it was all okay. I also reconnected with family and friends on a daily basis going for coffee, walks and dinner. The weather turned gorgeous and I spent 6 weeks enjoying the perfect Kootenay summer...and I mean PERFECT! Day after day of sunshine and heat. Living by the lake means a swim every day; the water warmed up considerably and although most people would say it is freezing, it's really lovely and refreshing in the 30 temperatures. My last swim in the lake was Sept 28th!

So now that I'm back on my blog, I'm ready to write again, specifically about my most recent trip: a three week trip across Canada and to the Maritimes with my dear Mom.

Since my blog was not working the whole time we were away, I'm going to post the entries one at a time. The dates are off and it is written in the present because I kept a journal on my iPad as we were travelling. Here goes:

October 3, 2012
My mom and I decided to take a little trip together. I was thinking she meant a trip around the Kootenay's staying in B&B's and checking out the local artisans' work. Turns out, she always wanted to go across Canada on the train. I couldn't say no.

We flew to Halifax via Toronto and even though it is my moms least favourite thing in the world (flying) she took her drugs and despite a 2-1/2 hour delay sitting on the Tarmac in TO, we made it to Halifax safe and sound.
First day - a gorgeous warm sunny day so we walked down to the pier from our hotel, about a 30 min walk and were delighted with the smells, sights and sounds of a busy port and boardwalk on the seafront. We strolled along looking at the ships and taking in the little shops. Not too busy this time of year and we enjoyed every moment.

One of the highlights of today was a tour of the Alexander Keith's brewery on lower Water street, complete with actors in period costume singing and serving us their delicious ales. We ate the best seafood chowder ever at a restaurant called "Salty's" finishing up with an ice cream from the east coast favourite - Cows Ice Cream. Yum! This was the beginning of a most extraordinary culinary experience. I can say I ate my way through the Maritimes. Yikes!

Tomorrow we meet up with a tour group and begin a 10 day tour of the Maritimes. I'm so excited to learn more of this vast and rich country I call "home". For now.

*Walk*Pray*Laugh*

When I began this journey ten months ago I had no idea the impact it would have  on me nor the adventures that lay ahead. I did not know I would change my plans to carry on travelling for the better part of a year. If I had thought about it, well, I probably wouldn't have done it. It evolved. I was open. It was meant to be.

As I contemplate  my journey home tomorrow I am trying to find a way to put into words my feelings, my thoughts, my anxieties and anticipation about ending what was the most extraordinary year of my life. I am excited beyond measure to see my children Sarah, Robbie, James and my son in law Robert, my Mom and all my friends, and, of course George, my puppy. How I have missed them! And I am very sad to say goodbye to everyone here - Sue and Terry, Ange, and all my cousins, and their lovely children as well as the friends I have made here. So, off come the hippy bracelets and the harem pants and on to the sobering reality of taxes, bills, responsibilities and the rather daunting prospect of finding a job..

 My blog has been an account of the details of my journey and my personal journal. I am amazed at the number of hits, ......mind you, 50% are probably my Mother! But I do appreciate those who have read and followed me along "The Way". What began as a 5 week pilgrimage has turned into a near year long discovery of who I am, what my life means and holds for me as I consider the next half of it. How do I keep with me those moments of sheer awe, of the extraordinary life changing experiences that will never be repeated, at least not in the same way. My mind is like a tornado, so many images and memories swirling around in my head it's dizzying! Even now, I will see something that reminds me of a situation, a person, a place, a moment and I get utterly lost in a memory that I hold dear to my heart. I must keep these moments alive even though I know it is not possible to live in those moments, and knowing they cannot be perceived by anyone else no matter how hard I try to describe them. If you see a smile cross my face at any given moment, you can be sure it will be because I am pondering one of those explicitly delicious moments, a memory I will hold on to ever so dearly. Some people have said, "you're like Julia Roberts in "Eat, Pray, Love".  I am naming this entry "Walk, Pray, Laugh". Here's why:
 **WALK** I must have walked hundreds of miles and have taken every opportunity to be outdoors. I have a weathered look about me and this has aged me considerably but I don't mind. To be outdoors is a welcome opportunity compared to working most of my life indoors. If I don't walk every day, I just don't feel quite right in my body. It calms my mind and exercises my body in a way that benefits and suits me. I have no aches or pains and feel healthy, well and fit. I am happiest when I am walking whether its along the beach of Crosby, the coastal cliffs of Cornwall, following the ubiquitous yellow arrow on the Camino path, hiking up a mountain in India, or walking through a pasture in northern England. Walking simply makes me happy.
 **PRAY** I have entered and prayed in countless churches and holy places of worship. I have lived prayer by walking the Meseta, by walking through the slums of Kolkata, by standing at the tomb of Mother Theresa, by observing the most beautiful and majestic animals in the kingdom, by immersing myself in sunsets and places of such profound beauty, and by standing in front of Masterpieces that have taken me back in time and taken my breath away. My time on the Camino and at Motherhouse renewed my faith and commitment to living a prayer filled life. I have said hundreds of "Hail Mary's" as I toiled up a particularly difficult hill, was lost and didn't know where to go, or felt so homesick for my kids I wanted to cry. It is this one quote that gives me all the strength I need to live my life: "You shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your mind".  Matt 23:37.  This is the pure and simple answer to have the most amazing life. To me, without this, I am nothing.
 **LAUGH** There were times where I laughed so hard my stomache hurt and my eyes spilled tears of joy. Arlene, Francis, Laura, Les, Eric, Sue, Terry, Stephanie, Steph, Linnea, Jess, Foxy, Gen, Richard, Ruth, Rachel, Nancy..to name a few. I thank you for laughing out loud with me. A good deep belly laugh is like medicine and there is nothing quite like it. I will remember with love all the people I've met and spent time with laughing, talking, eating, drinking, sharing. I pray I will see you all again someday. And if I don't, know that you will never be forgotten.

 A year of travel. A gift worth more than all the money I have or will ever have. Experiences that cannot be surpassed or repeated. Beautiful people I will never forget. Lessons that can be learned in no other way. An acute and growing awareness for those who struggle, where I do not. The observance of how cultures and customs shape the world. That no matter the colour of our skin or the language that we speak we are all People of God, whether we believe it or not. My pilgrimage has come to an end. Now, I must use the experiences to continue to have the most precious and blessed life. To live my life with passion and purpose and to fill it with love and beauty. To manage the stress and challenges that come my way with dignity, ease and grace. I will always remember the words of the Franciscan monk at La Faba and his special pilgrim blessing: "If you go home and merely tell stories about your Camino, you haven't really done the Camino. You have to change something about yourself, something about your life, and keep it with you always". I ponder how I have changed. My attitude to happiness and what that means to me. My ability to trust that all will work out the way it's meant to. My deepened sense of understanding and awareness of others. My purpose is unclear but I trust it will be revealed in time and I pray that I do not get pulled into the inertia and stagnation that life can sometimes be. I will continue to enrich my life every day.....Life, with all it's challenges, joy, beauty, sadness and pain. I will not take it for granted, no matter what. 

 A big theme for me this year was moving out of my comfort zone. I have a huge fear of getting lost and have always been intimidated by big cities. I do not have a good sense of direction, yet I have navigated my way through some of the biggest and busiest airports and metro stations in the world - London, Paris, Madrid, Barcelona, Dublin, Manchester, Casablanca, Addis Ababa, Nairobi, New Delhi, Kolkata, Dubai, Liverpool! And all by myself!  I have gained great confidence and feel brave and proud. I have been on dozens of flights and trains, slept in countless beds, with countless people! I have not driven a car in all this time. I have travelled the world. I have seen so much. I have lived life fully. I  have known true freedom. The more I see of the world, the more I realise there is still so much I haven't yet seen. Perhaps it is not an ending at all, but merely another beginning. So if this is what it's like to be 50, then I only have one more thing to say: BRING  IT ON!